February 12, 2017
Characteristics of Solid Relationships
Love
1 Corinthians 7:3
3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.
John 15:12-13
12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.
13 Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
9Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor:
10 If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
1 Timothy 5:8
8 Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
Titus 2:4 (ESV)
4 And so train the younger women to love their husbands and children
1 Peter 3:9
9 Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.
Luke 19:11
9 “So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.
1. What is LOVE?
When you ask, “What is Love?”, most people would say something along the line of, “It’s just when you love someone,” “it’s anything that makes us feel good,” or “an emotion that comes up when you care about someone.” Those aren't necessarily wrong, but they’re really watered down. And, all of those things are inward focused.
It’s sacrificing over being served, focusing outward over focusing on inward, and action over emotion. That’s real love.
Society would say that the definition of love is completely subjective. In saying that love is anything that makes us feel good, it’s taking control on ourselves, and saying that anything we feel good from can be described as true love. That’s just not true.
1 John 4:8
8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.
Romans 13:10
10 Love does no harm to a neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love is not about what you receive, love is about what you give.
2. How Does God Show Us Love?
1 John 3:16
16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us.
- God took on human form and came to earth
- He lived a sinless life
- He sacrificed his own life to pay the price for our sin
- He defeated death, and made a way for us to do the same
That is the most selfless, true, real, incredible love we know.
Psalm 139:14
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
Fearfully: with great reverse, heart-felt interest and with respect
Wonderfully: unique, set apart, marvelous
3a. Friendships
- We need to actually care about what they have to say.
- It's okay to have differnet "levels" of friends:
Jesus models it…
Acquaintances - People he spoke with, healed, prayed for
Casual Friends - 70 disciples who he lead and poured into
Close Friends - 12 apostles who he spent most of his time with
Intimate Friends - Peter, James, John - His inner circle
- Loving your friends means not only being there for them, but being willing to be open about yourself… be real with them, let them into your life.
- Pray with and for them every chance you get.
- Prayer is a necessary part of loving people
While praying for people you don’t know is great,
also pray for your friends
3b. Professional Relationships
Matthew 5:14-16
14 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.
We are always praying for hard people to walk through the doors of this church and sit down and hear about Jesus… And, it might be a while before they do that, but God circumvented “chance” and PUT you in their lives to reach them.
- Go out of your way to serve them
- Actually learn WHO they are
- Learn their story, and actually remember it
- Care enough to remember their eye color
- Remember their kids names
- Remember where they’re from
- Engage in meaningful conversations with them
3c. Family Relationships
It’s not enough to just be acquaintances with your family, KNOW your family.
- Serve your family.
- Go out of your way to bless them.
- Bringing home their favorite snack
- Initiating a game night to spend time together
- Doing their chores without being asked.
If you don’t live with your family, call them often,
let them know you love them.
3d. Romantic Relationships
For Valentines day:
If you are single, plan time with other single people and just have fun, practice friendly love with them!
If you are dating, figure out an appropriate level of affection to show: give them a funny gift, spend a fun day with them if you’re at a further stage of your relationship: go on a romantic date… Don’t overthink it, just enjoy each other, and remember that you can show love to each other without being “in love” with each other.
1 Corinthians 7:3
3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.
If you are married, have sex and have it often. Sex is the single most connecting thing you can do with your spouse. It’s intimate, and real, and shows love.
Also SAY “I love you” a lot
Communication Card
- I won’t let the world’s definition of love shape how I love people.
- (Married) I will selflessly love my spouse this Valentines Day.
- (Not Married) I will be intentional this week to love people like God does.
